This Week in Weird NFL Cars

"PatBateman" (PatBateman) 11/27/2016 at 12:24 • Filed to: NFLOL

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Football players can be flashy, no doubt. But this chromed out one ton GMC 3500 4x4 with PURPLE FUCKING RIMS takes “flashy” to the next level. And it’s not the only one-off car in the lot at NRG Stadium.

I can’t tell, but is that MB S-Class a Pullman or a Maybach?! WHY?!?!

Please note the matte army green Mercedes SUV with the red interior in the back. No comment.

New money makes people do weird shit.

Liam Farrell > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:29

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Remember the average players time in the NFL is 3 years, and also a lot of players go broke a few years after they are done.

PatBateman > Liam Farrell 11/27/2016 at 12:31

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I’m a financial advisor. I can’t say how I know it, but can confirm.

I’d rather see those cars for my clients instead of the Lambos and Ferraris that a lot of them buy.

Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now) > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:33

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Also remember that these are big guys, 300lbs linemen don’t fit particularly well in sports cars.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:34

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So many Ferds

BvdV - The Dutch Engineer > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:38

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The window-line on the S-Class suggests it’s a Maybach, IIRC a Pullman would have a bit between the front and rear door, and hence a pillar more.

European football/soccer players aren’t any better than this though, with some of them driving things like Mansory Bentleys or Techart Cayennes.

jkm7680 > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:38

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Lol who’s got the Corolla

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:43

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Such nouveau. Many riche.

Liam Farrell > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 12:48

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There are a few financial responsible, but those are few and far between. Also the fact that their contracts are so easy to cancel/terminate, I don’t see the reason why they don’t realize that.

PWRandSPD > jkm7680 11/27/2016 at 13:03

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The smart one!

PatBateman > Bman76 (hates WS6 hoods, is on his phone and has 4 burners now) 11/27/2016 at 13:07

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Some of them are. Mario Williams rocked an orange Murcielago when he played for us.

PatBateman > BvdV - The Dutch Engineer 11/27/2016 at 13:08

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That’s what I thought. Couldn’t get close enough to tell.

PatBateman > jkm7680 11/27/2016 at 13:09

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Probably a rookie saving his money.

Smart rookie.

PatBateman > Liam Farrell 11/27/2016 at 13:11

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A few years ago, the Texans got a talking to by the powers that be. They sold off their exotics and went to more “reasonable” vehicles. But yes, many spend their money like it’s always going to be there.

HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 13:32

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I’m guessing the biggest truck belongs to a kicker

Matt Nichelson > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 13:39

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If that’s where the players park I am actually surprised at how bland it is. Maybe I am just not up on what players drive these days.

PatBateman > HFV has no HFV. But somehow has 2 motorcycles 11/27/2016 at 14:02

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I’ve never seen it before at the game. I’m going to guess it’s our punter’s truck (he’s actually a hoss).

PatBateman > Matt Nichelson 11/27/2016 at 14:04

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A few years ago, the Texans players got told not to be so flashy. The Lambos and Ferraris disappeared and the trucks/hemis showed up.

Matt Nichelson > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 15:03

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Really? Huh. Didn’t know that. It’s not like we don’t know they make a lot of money.

So Strong fired and Herman hired same day. Any opinions on it?

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 15:51

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There is a rolls royce hiding in there

Tapas > PatBateman 11/27/2016 at 23:30

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Dude, that might not even be the players. People in Houston drive crazy and borderline psychedelic stuff more often than you’d think lol

PatBateman > Tapas 11/28/2016 at 10:08

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It’s the players’ parking lot.

Tapas > PatBateman 11/28/2016 at 11:30

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Wow, its too tame then. Or maybe I’m being mislead by HBO’s Ballers lol

PatBateman > Tapas 11/28/2016 at 12:26

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I stopped watching Ballers because it got so outlandish. I work in finance, and pretty much everything that every one of the advisors do on that show is either illegal or highly suspect. I finally couldn’t take it anymore.

Tapas > PatBateman 11/28/2016 at 12:55

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Hahaha I believe you.

I have watched only the first season. I am allergic to storylines that depart from reality while selling a show that’s supposed to be based in it.

RyanFrew > PatBateman 12/03/2016 at 12:00

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Haha, did Brock Osweiler decide to give all the O-linemen F-150s?

PatBateman > RyanFrew 12/03/2016 at 12:17

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Nah. The way they’ve been performing, they should get Ford Pintos.